Wednesday, October 29, 2003

ok..........there's this new comedy about to start showing next thursday.............it's called "Achar".............and it's abt an interracial relationship..................funny part is..........the guy is indian...........the girl is chinese..............but the title is malay~!

Tuesday, October 28, 2003

i sense impending doom..............yes.........impending doom.........the kind of doom that equates to flunking my exams.........isn't that exciting?!?!?

actually, it's kinda less impending than before..........and it's less doom-ish than before also.............basically im jus bored and sick of studying..............last nite i came up with an idea of how to make chicken rice.............but then.........it got lost when i woke up in the morning.........sooooo........the quitting school to sell chicken rice option is not a good idea now........but the quitting school to sell ba chor mee or kway chap option is still viable..........jus need to find out how to cook them................

one day, ill be selling freeze dried instant kway chap.............ya..........just add water to the packet and tadah~! hot or cold (depending on the water) kway chap in just 3mins~!

imagine the amount of money i might make.............note..........i did not specify how much money.............yes, im twisting the meaning..............it's my blog, i dun care................duh~

Sunday, October 26, 2003

today, i found a new source of knowledge.............the newspaper~!

i have never thought that the papers would be such an interesting source of knowledge...............i even found out what turtle, bull and buaya penises taste like without actually tasting them~!!

when i say buaya i mean the crocodile.............who in the right mind would want to know what the other type tastes like?!?

seriously though, there were other articles like how taller people have been proven to be more successful...........i think that's true.........not just for guyz, but for the girls also...........

im a butt and legs guy..........so i like my girls tall, leggy and with a nice butt.........but not taller than me.............yea.........in my dreams...........

Saturday, October 25, 2003

today has been "DO ABSOLUTELY NOTHING" day again...............this has become a chronic disease..............not good not good.................now my exams are only 5 days away...............die liao lah..........this time really die ugly ugly..........but interestingly, im not as worried abt them as i was before...............maybe cos i have a death wish...........y all this talk abt dying? cos im a singaporean under the singaporean education system where exams are a matter of life or death.........

that sux........

Wednesday, October 22, 2003

alrite..........archive links are up..........so everybody and anybody can go back...........actually only myself..........can go back to their favourite entries and read them again.........for those who are new to the blog..............you can enrich yourself with the vast amount of knowledge that is available here.............isn't that exciting~! wow~!!

you dun need to thank me for enriching your lives with vast amounts of absolutely worthless crap...........well...........errr.........wat the heck.............YOU'RE WELCOME~

Sunday, October 19, 2003

i am proud to declare that I HAVE DONE ABSOLUTELY NOTHING TODAY~!!!!
all i did was laze ard..........watch tv..........sleep.........this is bad considering my exams are less than 2 wks away.........BUT i have a valid excuse..........nope.........not valid reason.........a valid excuse.........ya ya ya..........it's an excuse...........there are no reasons for procrastination..................

ok.........so here goes...........i had a bad stomach.............ya.........the whole day.............it's an excuse and I LOVE IT~!!!

anywayz........at least i did something fulfilling...........i read a section of the papers...........now that's an achievement considering i seldom touch the papers..................and what did i learn from the papers today? well........i've learnt that the papers can be much more substantial visually than a porn mag if they wanted to...............there was a huge article on breasts today...........there are pictures of breasts all over the pages..............and to tell the truth i found it interesting............did u know the average cup size for women in s'pore has increased from A to B! wow~!!!

hopefully ill still be alive when that increases from B to C.............cos i believe an average handful is around a size C...........think my handful is around D...........but i doubt my hands or any of my 3 legs will be working when the average cup size increases to D...............that's sad.........but ill be looking forward to the B to C increase...........

Saturday, October 18, 2003

ok i think im allergic to eraser dust................got this rash right on the center of my italy (read YI-DA-LI).............it came about when i started studying for the exams and had lots of eraser dust on my table.................

ya......im not blaming the rash on the exams........bcos it's ridiculous to be blaming the exams for this kinda un-important thing.............we shldnt be condeming exams.........they do us so much good...........like kill our brain cells and make us more senile the more papers we take...........it makes us do extremely stupid things like writing inconsequential things and posting it up on the web for all to read.............ya..........exams are beneficial for us..............yup they sure are..........

ya rite, whoever believed or supported the last bit of crap i typed...........u must be a participant in the "Brainiest" contest.....by the way..........any1 noticed that almost all the participants so far are speckies? ya, and the next one, "Brainiest Scholar" is gonna be one hell of a laugh.................im looking forward to that..............yes...........scholars and me are a no no..........we dun mix well......................

was listening to the radio earlier on today..........and there was this programme about couples trying for children..........and they had this doctor on the programme to give some advice on how to optimise the factors for a couple to concieve........

one of these was about the woman having to take her temperature every morning........and i quote, "Take your temperature before you wake up in the morning" Ya, i get wat he tried to say..............but..............

how in the world do you expect to do that? how do you take your temperature before you wake up? i mean.........what are you doing before you wake up? you are sleeping~!!!! unless the doc's expecting the woman's significant other to take a thermometer and sticking it up her ass...........AND unless she is the kinky kind, i dun think Mr significant other will be significant for very long no matter if it's a thermometer or anything else for that matter...........

and then there's this other thing the doctor mentioned.............he mentioned that guyz should exercise more to increase fertility............and swimming is the best form bcos...........get this.........it cools the balls..............

no, he didnt say balls, he said testes. but i prefer "balls"..........i aint no doctor...............

then in my opinion guyz shld swim naked.............ya and scare the balls off all the other swimmers in the public pool........that way they cant concieve and based on the law of the wild..........the naked guy gets to spread his seed as widely as possible bcos he's the only one who can make them..........

or picture this...........couples trying to concieve will have something else to do when they wake up in the morning........the guyz wont be putting menthol shaving foam on their faces only..........

better still..........guyz NOT wanting their great lives ruined by children will be doing something else while their wives are sleeping at nite................in the bathroom taking hot showers..........

ok..........last bit..........

there's this new MacDonald's advert on tv now.........the one on the Fish McDippers..........and the jingle had this line in it, "My boy is dipping in his sauce and my sauce just like his dad"................hey, this is not PG rated you know...............sounds more NC-18 if you ask me.........if you dun get it..........use you imagination alittle...............if you still dun get it..............no amount of menthol shaving foam will ever help u.............

Thursday, October 16, 2003

today, i have set a new goal for myself.............i want to be earning $1m a month by the time the clock strikes 12 tonight........

no idea how im gonna achieve that in the next half hour...........any ideas any1?

yes.........im nutz...........and the worse part is i wasnt even studying earlier on...............this is disturbing news..........my exams are 2 wks away and i am not studying now..............oh no...........die liao lah................

ahhhh.........bo chup..............back to my goal on earning $1m/mth.............

Monday, October 13, 2003

im being attacked by mosquitoes..........it sux..............they are getting smarter nowadays...........they used to jus sit lazily in the most obvious places and get smacked......but now they choose places that they know are hard for me to strike fast........one just landed on my hand while i was studying..............it knows i cant smack my hand using my other fast enough without moving my first hand...........damn mosquitoes........man they are getting bigger nowadays..........

Wednesday, October 08, 2003

and......one more time.............for the record.......... STUDYING SUX~!!!!!

maybe ill jus quit school and go sell chicken rice.............maybe ba chor mee is better..........

anywayz..........the final race of F1 is this weekend~!!! yay~!!!
cant wait to watch it..........goodie~~

Monday, October 06, 2003

ok.............once again..........for the record..........I HATE STUDYING~!!!!!!!!!

sigh............now im thinking........why did i end up in comp eng?
if only i had gone to BizAd..............sighz.........all these stupid numbers and dunno wat shit..........du lanz only.........

Thursday, October 02, 2003

somebody pls explain to me how the women in "the bachelor" can actually fall in love with the bachelor guy after just being with him for that few days?!?!?!
nvm that...........how in the world can the bachelor himself fall for all 15 women?!?!?!?!
the only logical reason i can think of is that he is one horny bastard...........and then they mus all cry cry and go all drama drama when they dun get a rose.........duh!

sighz.........if only i were the bachelor...........lucky bastard...........damn those girls look good~!