sianz boy...........fooking sianz...........one more time........sianz boy..............
lately ive come to a revelation abt certain things in life that we percieve to be difficult to achieve or attain..........

very often we hear things like, "it's too hard" or "ive tried my best" or "ive already done this this this. but dunno why still not enuff"..............well, a lesson ive learnt in my course of quitting the cigarette...........is that, it's not just abt how much you do...........there's something else that's equally as important as the amount of effort you put in to attaining your goals.........simply - it's how much do you want it........

it's quite a simple thing actually.............but not easy to swallow or carry out also...........few people can actually swallow the fact that what they do is just not enuf.............often, it's this self denial that leads to problems........a person has to open his own eyes wide open and admit that, hey, ive not done enuf...........and then ask himself.............how much does he really want to get to his goal...........other than knowing what goal it is........perhaps knowing the impacts and consequences of achieveing the goal will help boost his determination...............

and today im proud to admit and celebrate 2 things...........
1. i flunked my last sem exams bcos i did not put in enuf effort for them..........and my goal is to make sure i clear the rest of my semesters as smoothly as possible............and then get a job that i will do to the fullest of my capabilities.........jus so i wun let myself down...........

2. it's been 2mths since 9th Jan 04...........the day that i gave up smoking for life..............:)